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Feeling Like a Fraud or an Imposter?

December 19, 2016 by Peter Michaelson

The imposter syndrome is based on an unconscious disconnect from self.

The imposter syndrome is based on an unconscious disconnect from self.

As a young actor in the 1960s, Michael Caine was sitting across from Frank Sinatra in a private plane on a flight to Las Vegas when, overwhelmed by the moment, he suddenly became tongue-tied and speechless.

Sinatra said, “Mikey, what’s up? You scared of flying?”

Caine, who was dating Sinatra’s daughter, admitted he was feeling overwhelmed by the conviction that he didn’t belong in the famous singer’s presence. Sinatra told him he knew the feeling and had experienced it himself many years earlier in the company of the Academy-Award winning actor Ronald Colman.

“You see, that’s how it is,” Caine remarked decades later in a documentary about his life, “we all come from nothing and nobody.”

The young Caine was experiencing a feeling called imposter syndrome (also referred to as imposter phenomenon or fraud syndrome). It describes the experience of high-achieving individuals who find it difficult to internalize their accomplishments and connect with their worthiness. Studies have found, as well, that 70 percent of all people, not just high-achievers, feel like imposters at one time or another. [Read more…]

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Filed Under: Depth Psychology, Inner Passivity Tagged With: authentic self, depersonalization, dissociation, feeling disconnected, feeling like a fraud, imposter syndrome, inner fear, relationship to self

Aspects of Women’s Empowerment (Part II)

April 8, 2013 by Peter Michaelson

WWS-WomenPThe women’s revolution has stalled, in part because of psychological barriers women impose on themselves, writes Facebook executive Sheryl Sandberg in her book, Lean In: Women, Work, and the Will to Lead (Alfred A. Knopf, New York, 2013).

These psychological barriers “are rarely discussed and often underplayed,” Sandberg writes. Instead, many women prefer to blame institutional or external barriers for their lack of progress. But “internal obstacles deserve a lot more attention,” she writes.

What are these psychological issues standing in the way of women’s progress? Sandberg identifies internal barriers that include fear, self-doubt, guilt, risk-adverse instincts, acceptance of cultural stereotypes, and sensitivity to the feeling of being disliked. The author cites numerous psychological studies and draws on her considerable personal experience to discuss these issues. The women’s revolution is a vital aspect of human progress, of course, yet this revolution could conceivably fizzle out if we don’t see more deeply into our psychological issues. In a previous post, I examined some deeper aspects of patriarchal oppression, and in this post I consider the deeper elements of women’s self-oppression.

Sandberg writes that fear is a major problem for many aspiring women:

Fear is at the root of so many of the barriers that women face. Fear of not being liked. Fear of making the wrong choice. Fear of drawing negative attention. Fear of overreaching. Fear of being judged. Fear of failure. And the holy trinity of fear: the fear of being a bad mother/wife/daughter.

Both men and women have irrational fears, and these fears are produced out of unresolved conflict in our psyche. We benefit greatly from exposing the inner dynamics that produce these fears. Referring back to Sandberg’s statement above, let’s look more deeply into these dynamics. [Read more…]

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Filed Under: Depth Psychology, Psyche Tagged With: fear of failure, imposter syndrome, progress, psychological defenses, risk-adverse instincts, unconscious mind, women and fear, women's revolution

MOST OF OUR SUFFERING IS avoidable. Our emotional and behavioral problems can be resolved. We just have to understand how our psyche works. This website is dedicated to teaching vital psychological knowledge. Do you need help to curb drinking or to get off drugs? Are you facing a divorce or a career failure? Are you anxious, depressed, or overwhelmed by life's challenges? Perhaps you're simply unable to get your mind or intelligence into high gear. I can help. I'm Peter Michaelson, an author and psychotherapist in Ann Arbor, Michigan. I teach people how to overcome unconscious programming that produces suffering and self-defeat.

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My book, Why We Suffer--A Western Way to Understand and Let Go of Unhappiness, is the amazing story of what mainstream psychology has failed to teach the world. Read the reviews and buy the e-book for $7.97 at Amazon.com.

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